OTTAWA — In the preceding column, I wrote: “… we all know that the religious Right are sore losers and they will use every underhanded technique in the book to deny LGBT people civil rights.”
Well, I was wrong. Here’s one right-winger who is not really underhanded, but more like … er … under-weared.
South Dakota state legislator Roger Hunt has proposed that “visual inspection” be used as part of a process to officially determine someone’s gender in South Dakota.
So why on Earth is Roger Hunt so eager to get in your pants? Stop that now; that’s not what I meant … don’t get a big head. And anyway, he’s not even good-looking.
No, Hunt proposed this scheme specifically in reaction to a progressive policy adopted by the South Dakota High School Activities Association that grants transgender students the chance to participate on the sports team corresponding to their declared gender.
Apparently, this riled Mr. Hunt up so much that he came up with his undie-inspection idea. Let’s try to imagine the ads that the South Dakota government will run if this proposal becomes law:
“Wanted: Student sexers.”
“Job description: Perform visual inspection of students to determine the sex they have had since conception. The work hours will be long and the work hard, sometimes very long and hard or even extremely long and hard, depending on the student. Conditions are variable, however, and may entail enduring high humidity and warmth. The occasional sighting of blood is a potential hazard.”
“Experience: Knowledge of chicken-sexing helpful, but not mandatory. A working knowledge of Leviticus is a definite asset.”
“Education: The less, the better. And no Life Science graduates, thank you.”
“The Government of South Dakota appreciates your interest in this position (shame on you!) While we cannot personally respond to all applicants, we will be recording all of your names, addresses and other personal information.”
But seriously, I really think it’s time we did some serious ridiculing of these boneheaded lawmakers. So in the grand tradition of Dan Savage’s “santorum”, I propose a search to coin a new and disgusting meaning for the term “dakotaroger”. I was thinking about “rogerhunt”, but there are too many innocent Roger Hunts out there … let’s not cause collateral
So come on, everyone; put on your thinking caps and comment below with your choice for dakotaroger’s new definition.
(Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons)
“Let harmlessness be the keynote of your life.” — Alice Bailey